Thirteenth Blog - What I learned about menopause

What I thought I knew - Well, really, I didn't know anything. It's not something I talked about with my mother. I don't remember her going through the big change, because, by then, I was married. I guess I could ask my sister about her experience or maybe my youngest sibling, my brother. As Bill Cosby would say, "Right!" In fact, I missed the big puberty movie in the 6th grade as I was out with the mumps. I learned more about sex from reading my Dad's Playboy magazines and guessing or asking my friends. All I can say is, thank goodness tampons were invented. (Just a warning, if you don't talk about this stuff, you will either be disgusted or fascinated...)

As I reached 50, my doctor, whom I saw once a year, indicated that I needed to stop using birth control and apparently I needed to arrange my thoughts around the possibility of menopause. I won't bore you with the scientific facts or proper names for the stages that signify the end to a monthly irritation, although I'm more  irritated on an unscheduled basis than ever a mere period could instigate.  Over the years and with the discovery (by me and for me) of birth control with low dosages of hormones, my experience was pretty mild, not even requiring pain pills. I know some women have not had the same "nice" monthly vacation from dry underwear, but I had some moments when I was younger.

For example: I didn't "start" until my doctor insisted it was time when I was 16 years old. He gave me some pills to get puberty rolling, unfortunately not increasing my cup size any. Until I was in my 30's I never had a regular cycle. This often created some anxiety and several tense months here and there. Perhaps having children was the beginning of a cycle that was actually monthly. I recall having my heaviest periods when I was unprepared. Or maybe, when one is unprepared, toilet paper is just not enough. I've been unprepared in the Amazon jungle in Ecuador, but thankfully, there was the equivalent of a 7-11 at the bus station when we were heading back to Quito.

What I have learned - My doctor was right, although my body did not change immediately after my 50th birthday. I continued to cycle for about a year, being forced to worry about pregnancy from a condom's point of view. Then I was unaffected by a period for about 9 months, then for about 4 months, then 6 months. One Thursday when I was probably 51 and attending a morning meeting, I complained about being hot. My friend Wendy accurately pointed out that I was "having a hot flash." I began to think that she was right. RATS! This is noticeable at night; I layer the blankets, pulling them up and kicking them off later. I did some gentle research on-line, but was annoyed by an overabundance of remedies for menopause. I wondered about the question over taking estrogen or battling it out all by myself. Because I tend to allow my body to be in charge (I'm still in charge of taking care of my body), I still have gray hair and I have not asked my doctor about taking estrogen.

Not sleeping. This is not a symptom that is commonly advertised as a part of menopause. What you do hear about is the mood swings. I say, well of course!!! I'm not getting any quality sleep and I can't seem to finish my dreams. This comes and goes as your hormones no longer do their job of regulating your body's habits and, your emotional moods. There are times when I'm in an extremely good mood, ready to tackle anything and very productive. For instance, recently, it only took me 1-1/2 weeks to make and finish a quilt (measuring 95 x 95 inches). I wonder if that is what a manic phase is like? Then, because I don't sleep well for days at a time, I feel like I can't get anything productive accomplished. I don't have the energy to think about things that require thought, such as writing this blog or doing anything to market my counseling business.

Sometime, I feel things very strongly. Maybe that was my first symptom, in my late 40's. Sadness strikes me during movies, in the car when songs that are reminders play on the radio and when I'm watching an emotional TV show - this can last for a few days. It always gets better, which is great. Feeling sad is not the same as when I've been depressed after losing a job or my parents. But thinking about those things makes me sad. I wonder if there is a cycle to this roller coaster of heat, sleeplessness, sadness and great energy. I'll let you know later as I learn more, because I've got to try to take a nap this afternoon. Or, I will just lay there and get up after a while.